How Bout Some Football

The coming of Thanksgiving means two very important things, turkey and football. So naturally I could only fill my football craving one way, by jackin up some fools. So Saturday was the day us guys had planned to let of some steam and play America's true pastime. So when we get out there it is like 30 degrees the field is frozen, but we didn't care, we just wanted to play.

So the game starts off with me, Summers, Berti, Emaise, and Noel on one team. And Lee, Kdubs, Tripp, Jelso, Girbach, and Mr. Football himself Chris Ciric on the other. Even though we were one man down, we felt as if we were the superior team. Anyways, game starts quick with Dave Uberti aka "I'm so much better than Chew" unleashing a cannon down field to a streaking DPC, with his above average speed, who finishes it off with a beautiful touchdown grab. "Seven nothin bitches" we could already see the vulnerability in their eyes. The game continues and both teams trade touchdowns making the game a little more interesting. Next the other team punts the ball off to us, and I am feeling like Triple T Terry Tate barreling down the field looking for some heads to hunt. Guess who shows up in the cross hairs, tennis boy (we will leave religious denominations out of this, thank you Jelso) Lee . So his side of the story is that he didn't see me but it really doesn't matter because we were both coming head on and alls I know is that I just lowered the shoulder and just watched him fly. At first I felt bad because I was fearful that I broke his jaw, but then I realized that I had done what I craved to do, jack up someone's shit. The rest of the game was really a blur, I remember tons of scoring, Berti getting a million interceptions, Jelso being in a pissy mood, myself almost tearing Girbach's ACL, and after it all I was bleeding and I had a scar. Next I will break down everyone's play on Saturday.

Myself: One word INTIMIDATION

Berti: Gunslinger, free safety combo who has a knack for the big plays one negative is his refusal to host the postgame party.

Summers: The man just loves to truck people. He impressed me with his ability to break tackles(must be those long hours at the Planet), always looked for the extra yard even if it meant he had to run an extra 30 yards.

Emaise: Solid player in every phase of the game, always would make the sure tackle and had reliable red zone hands. Is he the next basketball switchover a la Antonio Gates.

Noel: Kickoff specialist similar to Devin Hester, could find the open seam and run to daylight. Just needs to work on waiting and setting up his blockers.

Lee: Poor Lee, suffered a setback early in the game when he ran into a train, but remained calm and succesfully manged his team as quarterback with great pocket presence.

Kdubs: The biggest hitter on the other team, I know personally, he is a load to bring down because we all know he is the big 180 lbs. But I know my team couldn't stop and thinking what Kyle would look like in a penguin suit.

Tripp: Impressed me the most, was a dangerous deep threat and had fairly reliable hands around the goal line area. Also had great field presence, unlike Lee, when running around the middle of the pitch.

Girbach: Showed tenacity and dare I say it a few bursts of speed. May have been slightly hampered after his leg almost was split into two.

Jelso: I could never get a read on Jelso, he went from being good old crazy Jelso to all of a sudden wanting to kill me and rip my face to shreds. Have to admit though he had a hell of a touchdown grab when he rose above to snag the ball.

Ciric: Showed his intensity for the game right away when he changed into cleats, shorts, and a Rudi Johnson jersey. Displayed an uncanny knowledge for the game and fended off tacklers with his weightlifting prowess.

I will leave this blog with a little sports and football humor. The next video is mockery of one of the biggest asses in the world Jim Rome done by the always funny Frank Caliendo.